Fernando Torres, everybody's favourite floppy-haired blonde striker from the late noughties, is now 34-years-old.
After announcing he would be leaving Atleti, Torres was linked with a whole host of different clubs, including the likes of Chicago Fire and Sydney FC.
At his grand Sagan unveiling on Tuesday morning, Torres held aloft a scarf which, according to our favourite J-League shaman, journalist Dan Orlowitz, read "This isn't a false report!" - a reference to the premature announcement of the transfer posted (then hastily deleted and apologised for) on the league's official website back in May.
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Sky Sources confirmed that Johnson repeatedly used the phrase at the away day at Chequers, the prime minister's country retreat. Prime Minister Theresa May announced Hunt's new role in a tweet, adding that the queen had approved the change.
"I think Japan and the Japanese League is going to be a great experience, they have made a great effort and they believe that I can be one of the solutions so that the team returns to the place where it has to be".
Torres, who posed for a photo at the event holding a Sagan Tosu shirt alongside club chairman Minoru Takehara, will join the club on an 18-month contract, with an option to extend the deal until 2020.
While Peter Crouch has not had quite the glistening career of the Italian World Cup victor, he would certainly be taken to very kindly by the Australians.